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BK Blog Post
Posted by Christopher Avery, CEO, Partnerwerks, Inc..
Author of Teamwork Is An Individual Skill: Getting Your Work Done When Sharing Responsibility
Jessica Soroky continues her series Leadership is a Choice.
The last few weeks I have invited you to walk a journey with me through an anxiety problem that I was deeply struggling with. Today I am excited to share the part of the journey that includes growth, realizations, and forgiveness.
Last week was an extremely hard week. The crazy thing is when I reflect back upon the week it really wasn’t that hard. Wins piled up day after day and I got to wake up every day and work in an industry I love.
All of that was passed over in the moment, the anxiety around one situation won out over all else. It hit me that it was going to keep winning until I chose for it to lose. I chose to take back my own power and simply not allow the anxiety.
It was an email from Bella about that day’s The Leadership Gift Program Q and A call that helped me see an opportunity to confront this and really let it go.
After walking through what the anxiety felt like, and what I believed was causing it Christopher asked where in the Power or Control Proces™ I thought I was.
Well, I felt trapped, out of control, and my solution was to physically run until I was too tired to think about the anxiety anymore.
I really had no idea what running would be considered on the Power or Control Process, I was completing avoiding the situation.
So what was feeling trapped? Christopher quickly restated it as doing something I felt I had to do even though I didn’t want to.
Holy crap, I never even considered that I was in these mental states. It completely altered how I looked at the problem. When I was looking at it as a feeling of being trapped and avoidance I wasn’t aware or anywhere close to owning the situation. I was stuck in a place I had been at the very beginning of my journey – how the hell do you actually let go of something?
It seemed almost impossible.
Ok, Obligation and Quit. Those words I understand, those mental states I know how to get myself out of once I become aware.
Christopher helped me see that on some level there is a sanctuary, a familiar safe place, in the mental states below the line. He also helped remind me of an intention I have to have and be all that I want, to reach my full potential.
The bricks that I believed to be sitting on my chest, and the water I believed I was drowning in all disappeared. As simple as that, I let it go.
I forgot who I was, what I had accomplished. I let fear of failure, fear of taking that final leap of power and taking responsibility get in the way of actually taking responsibility.
The first time I took a leap (or as I have described it before, “taking the red pill”) I was doing so ignorant to what I was really getting myself into. Now on days where I miss the bliss that came with being unaware of what mental state I am in, the idea of taking another red pill – of going deeper into wonderland – is somewhat scary.
It isn’t scary because of something that might be defined as “bad”. It is scary because when I choose to practice 100% responsibility I am choosing to own exactly who I am and what I do.
Oh but wait, when I choose to practice 100% responsibility I get to own 100% of the power and freedom that come with it. When I am completely at choice there is no opportunity for my anxiety to spring back to life in the form of obligation.
The only way I could feel trapped or drowning is if I chose to feel that way. Why would I want to do that when I can chose happiness, fulfillment, and excitement?
Who would have thought that a person practicing responsibility and dedicated to choice would realize the answer to her problem is as simple as choosing something different.
Jessica Soroky, CSM
Jessica is a Certified Scrum Master with over three years of practice in agile delivery and seven years of team leadership. She is also the youngest participant in The Leadership Gift™ Program and its growing worldwide community of leaders and coaches. After five years of non-profit development through Nellie’s Catwalk for Kids, Jessica continues her leadership journey in state government, not-for-profit, and private sector leadership studies.
For Businesses Partnerwerks provides a unique, proven model that ignites cultures of self-direction and ownership.
The post An Anxiety Free Breakthrough – Leadership is a Choice #11 appeared first on Christopher Avery's The Leadership Gift™ Blog.