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Cultivate Self-Leadership Skills

The most powerful leadership tool you have is your own personal example.
John Wooden

Self-leadership is of critical importance for the caring leader, in that if she doesn’t lead herself first, she cannot properly care for those she leads. She must understand her purpose and why she leads; be self-aware and understand and adapt to the people around her; have control over her mindset; understand the role of influence; consistently grow her skills; have a coach or mentor; and simply take time to care for her mind, body, and spirit.

Understanding the “Why” for Leading

Simon Sinek popularized this concept of knowing or finding your “why” in his 2009 book, Start With Why.¹ What did Sinek mean by “why”? He explains, “When I say WHY, I don’t mean to make money—that’s a result. By WHY I mean what is your purpose, cause, or belief? WHY does your company exist? WHY do you get out of bed every morning? And WHY should anyone care?”

In my interviews with every leader I speak with on my podcast, I often ask them where their drive to lead comes from. This is just my way of asking them about their “why” for leading. Their answer to this question really does set the tone for everything else they tell me. I do not mean to imply that once they know their drive to lead, they will be perfect leaders. Rhoda Banks, vice president, head of talent management at Rabo AgriFinance, said it perfectly: “I am really big on figuring out what our purpose is in life and living it out loud. So, if you believe that your purpose is to influence and impact others in a positive way through leadership, what better way to be able to do that? Then, every decision you make, every action you take, everything you do should be aligned with that purpose.”

During our interview, Phil Cohen, founder and president of Cohen Architectural Woodworking, summed it up this way: “There’s only one thing you need to remember if you want to work at a place—find out why the owner is in business, or wherever you go, find out why the leader is there, find out why he’s in business. The leader’s heart will tell you everything about what it’s like to work there.” The same holds true whether you own a business or lead a small or large team or organization. It is, indeed, the leader’s heart and how he expresses it to those he leads that tells us whether he genuinely cares.

Below is a sprinkling of responses from leaders on my podcast when asked about their drive to lead. All provide insight into the heart and mind of the caring leader:

My inspiration is, I do feel like I’m put here for a purpose and very in touch with the fact that there’s just some God-given thing that I’m here to fulfill for this world, and I have a responsibility to do it. And part of that, I know, has to do with helping people to be their best selves. And I feel that we spend so much time in our workplace. Why not have our best selves show up there? —Judith Scimone, senior VP, chief talent officer, MetLife

I want to be a servant-oriented leader. When I really dug deep into this idea of loving and serving, it’s coming every day and . . . trying to figure out how do I serve the people that report to me so that they can be successful? How do I enable them to be successful? How do I help them grow? . . . How do I correct along the way? —Daniel McCollum, founder and CEO, Torrent Consulting

My drive to lead started during my freshman year in college. I was immediately indoctrinated into the military, where I understood the gravity of the service that I was about to enter. After I graduated, I fully understood that I was going to lead men and women, and sons and daughters, the most precious gifts that parents could give to the country. It was a pretty tremendous responsibility. —Don Davis, county manager, Jefferson County, Colorado

And I think my “why” is just thinking back on being a blind child and talking to parents who are like my parents. They had never met a blind person before they have a child who’s blind. They don’t know where to go or are scared. They don’t know what the future can hold. And I talked to parents all the time. And they asked me, . . . “What does the future hold for my child?” I say, “I can’t, at this point in time, honestly say it’s not going to be a struggle. You’re going to have to do everything right. You’re going to have to fortunately live in the right school district that has the right resources. You’re going to have to go above and beyond all the time to put your child in a position to live the life they want to live, and it’s very hit or miss if you happen to be born into a family that has resources and has advocacy skills, and you know you can make it. If you’re not, then it gets very, very hard for people.” So, I would really like to be able to sit across the table from those parents and say, “No, your kid can do whatever they want to do in life. Here’s how, here are the resources. Here are the pathways. Here are some examples.” —Kirk Adams, president and CEO, American Foundation for the Blind

Given the fact that I’ve been so fortunate in my life, the one thing that drives me every single day is to make my parents proud and just to show that all their sacrifice and trust in me and faith in me is paying off. And I’m doing that by contributing back to the state that I live in and into my community. —Patty Salazar, executive director, Colorado Department of Regulatory Agencies

Many of the leaders I interviewed were driven to lead by personal adversity, by exposure to wonderful leaders inside and outside of their home, and through a deep calling to do something good in the world. No matter the reason, all were clear about their “why,” which helped them in their leadership journey.

My “why” stems from my own childhood (more on this in chapter 9) and culminates in a workplace experience that left me feeling that I had to be the leader who helped others care more. I, like many at work, was growing apathetic, angry, and hopeless. I worked at a place that was going through a merger of multiple companies. I tried hard to uplift those around me, but the overall culture of mistrust was growing and taking its toll on me. The leaders in charge of the merger did not properly and consistently communicate to the front line what was going on. Employees were frightened of losing their jobs. New employees who joined the company had titles that were very similar to current employees’. Heck, I found out that another employee was given my job and that I had been moved to a new role by reading about it on an intranet post!

Employees on my immediate team and those in the larger organization started to report cultural discontent. I knew someone had to try to do something to make it better. I went to the head of human resources in the Denver office and said, “We have got to do something about our engagement and all the mistrust!” She replied, “You are right! You should go do something about that. You are the perfect person for that.” I was shocked at this response, because I was leading customer experience at the time. After some reflection, though, I realized that there was truth to it. Before this conversation, I had begun to feel myself fall into a pit of despair. I knew that I already served as a sort of culture-bearer. I seized the opportunity to be the change I was seeking.

So, I convened an employee engagement council that had employees from many of the companies involved in the merger as its members. We curated opportunities for everyone to connect and build trust. In short order, we could see trust grow between people because we put them into situations where they had to learn more about one another, the similarities and the differences. It was a beautiful sight. Nonetheless, the merger itself did not go well, and they laid off a few hundred people. I was one. That layoff put me on the path I am on now.

Along with my childhood journey, that layoff made me realize that I was supposed to be the voice for those who could not speak for themselves or who did not have a seat at the decision-making table. I needed to be the bridge for increased enlightenment. My “why” drives me to show deep concern and kindness to others in consistent ways.

Being Congruent

To lead with a caring heart, leaders must be congruent in who they want to be and who they actually are, both out in the world and behind closed doors. All leaders are in a constant battle to create more alignment or congruence in how they show up to those they lead and how they want to show up.

The beloved Howard Behar, former president of Starbucks and a member of the Leadership With Heart podcast community, shared an example of what this battle looks like when he described an exchange he had with his wife of forty years, who is an oncology social worker. Howard is a well-known author and leader. He was continually trying to push his wife to be a writer because she was good at it, but she did not have a desire to write. It did not speak to her soul as it does to Howard’s. It was more about his dream and the thing that drives him and not what drives her. One night, they were at dinner and they got into an argument because Howard mentioned the writing thing again. He slept on the couch that night, and he woke up early in the morning and apologized to her for thinking about himself and not about what she wanted.

Here is what Howard said in reflection: “One of my mission statements for myself goes like this: ’Every day, I want to nurture and inspire the human spirit. Beginning with myself first and then for others.’ I say ’self’ first, because what I’ve learned after living this long is if I’m not OK with Howard, then I can’t help anybody else.” Howard did not feel, in this example, that he was nurturing and inspiring his wife’s human spirit by forcing the issue of writing with her. By extension, he did not feel congruent with his personal mission. His willingness to self-correct and admit his mistakes is a key behavior of a caring leader.

Howard’s reflection brings up for me how hard it is to be congruent in all parts of our lives. I am a mother of four children. I am also certified in emotional and social intelligence and in communication styles. You would think I would be the master of congruence if you assumed that I am self-aware at all times. This is not always the case. I might find myself writing a post on social media or sending an email about being a more compassionate communicator and then turn around and yell at my kids when they need me to sit and listen. I see myself as a compassionate communicator, but I do not always show up that way. Like many other leaders, I battle to be congruent. It is a fight worth fighting if we are to be effective at caring for those we lead.

It boils down to what Daniel McCollum, founder and CEO of Torrent Consulting, said during our interview: “I came to a realization that if I’m going to get up and talk about growing leaders and being servant oriented and growing and developing, I, as the CEO, have to be the one that grows the fastest, leads the most—that serves the most of anybody in the company. So, if I can’t keep up and I can’t model that, then nobody else will be able to.”

As both Howard and Daniel allude, being congruent also requires a greater self-awareness and a deep desire to show up true to one’s self. It also requires intentionality. Personally, I remain more congruent when at the end of each day I examine what happened and whether I showed up as I intended and in line with my personal values.

Be Intentional

As leaders, we must understand one truth: People are always watching us. They are paying attention to our actions, our words, and what we fail to say. There is no getting past this. We must be intentional about what they see and hear. We can choose to control this. This might mean that we exercise good emotional self-management when in meetings or sitting with team members. We may work hard to maintain a positive, forward-thinking mindset or simply set a plan and then stick to it.

None of what I have written in this book happens by accident. We must be purposeful and aware of who we are, recognize our perceived gaps, and go about filling those gaps. Our desire to be a caring leader is an evolutionary process. We will make mistakes that can be painful, but they serve as exciting opportunities to learn. Through our intentionality to change and improve for ourselves, we earn the right to stay on the journey to caring leadership. If we do not set our intent from the start, our entire journey will feel like an accident. We will feel that we control less.

Carey Jenkins, CEO of Substantial, a digital strategy firm, described her focus on intentionality around her mindset and the conversations she has with those she leads: “I am incredibly intentional with the conversations I have about the way I support and mentor people and my expectations for what we are trying to do at the company and how people contribute to that.” For Carey, intentional looks like being very clear about expectations and how others can contribute their gifts to the mission. She is a direct communicator who does not leave others guessing.

Ron Alvesteffer, CEO of Service Express, recalled for me a time when he was not the caring leader he is today and what he intentionally did to change:

I led with the relationship with my team first and started with “Hey, how are you doing? What are the roadblocks? What do you need from me?” instead of “Go do this for me.” Go solve their problems and go to work for them. Before a meeting, I would be purposeful; I would make sure I am leading the person sitting before me first. We will get to the numbers later. You have to be purposeful or it can get away from you, and now you are talking about numbers and business results. It’s the people who deliver the numbers and business results. When you get that in the wrong order, it doesn’t work out well. A great culture and focusing on the people will deliver the results.

I still remember my conversation with Ron and how he was clear about his intentional change of mind and how he treated his people. It was as if he had become awakened to the fact that he held the brush and could choose his own brushstrokes in demonstrating care for his people.

Christinne Johnson, president of human resources at FirstBank, reflected with me on a time when she went into a meeting prepared to present a big change she was going to be leading. She admitted that when she had met resistance, she let her ego get in the way and felt triggered and was very emotional. Christinne even planned for a colleague to signal her when she was crossing any lines, but she ignored her colleague’s signals. After the meeting, she took a time-out to reflect on the situation, realized that she should have been more in control of her emotions, and decided that she had to make things right. She gathered her thoughts and then took time to meet individually with different people who had been at the meeting and apologize to them. Regarding that interaction, she said, “That was really defining for me, because I really do try more now to have that . . . pause in the situation when I know that something is starting to trigger me a little bit and just pause because I am very passionate.”

Leaders set the tone for their teams and organizations. Period. If we do not own that truth, we can never uplift those we lead. Adding another level of texture to the importance of being intentional, Keith Freier, director of operational systems and technology at Pacific Northwest National Laboratory, so simply added this when reflecting on the movie Remember the Titans: “It gets back to that attitude reflects leadership again. . . . You have to set that positive tone; the organization is going to follow with that tone. If you come in grumpy and kicking the walls, guess what the rest of the organization is going to do? The same thing. So, that’s something that I’ve always tried to . . . keep whatever’s burdening me at home.”

Keith is so right! I loved Remember the Titans exactly for the reason Keith referenced. The main character, as portrayed by Denzel Washington, acts with great intention and conviction by setting aside the tough racial climate of segregation in the 1960s and choosing to lead and grow his team’s unity. In short, intentionality requires focus.

As Washington’s character made clear, intentionality requires that leaders set their minds right in advance of interactions, especially when they know they might experience conflict or conflicting views. Megan Bertrand, senior vice president of learning and development at FirstBank, takes this concept home for us in a powerful way: “You’re never going to change how others react and say things. You’re never going to change those persons. But you, as yourself, can change how you react to them and to the situation.”

Megan confessed that prior to holding that belief, she was struggling in her professional relationships, especially with those who had different personalities and ways of thinking than hers. She admitted wanting to change those people, but she realized quickly that she needed to change her reaction to them and her mindset. She realized that she needed to hold up a mirror to herself and be purposeful in changing.

Since I was very young, I have worked hard to be intentional in my thinking and in how I relate to others. I find that I do this by focusing forward and using my mission and vision like a sort of bull’s-eye. Then, I load action up front aligned with that mission that keeps me focused and without much time to look back or get stuck.

As stated in the introduction, anyone seeking to become a caring leader must first have an awareness that they need to change and a desire to do the work required to change. So many leaders out in the world think of themselves as caring leaders, but the recipients of that type of leadership are the gauge of whether caring leadership behaviors are exhibited. It is worthwhile to be intentional. It is the only way to become a caring leader. During my leader interviews, none of them recalled a time of successful leadership that did not include being purposeful and reflective.

Have a Support System

I can attest to the fact that leaders cannot do it alone. They need to have a support system in place, whether it be close colleagues, friends, mentors, or coaches. Any leader who tries to lead people without at least occasionally seeking counsel cannot be a caring leader. Why? Hindsight is never as clear as we’d like it to be. When we enlist the help of others, we gain more foresight and develop strategies to bypass possible barriers in our way.

Phil Burgess, chief people and operations officer at C Space, clearly understands why having a support system is critical. When Phil needs a “safe space to be a vulnerable leader,” he turns to other leaders who are going through the same thing, with whom he can talk about all the stuff that might be going wrong. He chooses to lean on them for good counsel.

On the same concept of finding people you can trust to provide honest feedback and ensure that you are on the path you intend, Cori Burbach, assistant city manager for the City of Dubuque, Iowa, shared that she, too, leans on colleagues across the country whom she trusts and to whom she can say, “Here’s what I’m trying. I’m stuck.” And they can say, “Oh, Cory, remember this about yourself? That’s why you’re reacting this way. What if you looked at it this way instead?”

Keith Freier, the leader I mentioned in the “Be Intentional” section above, elevated this concept by introducing the idea of having a “personal board of directors.” Keith realized that there is power in selecting more than one mentor. In fact, he discovered that not all leaders shine in every area. He uncovered the fact that he could increase his effectiveness if he could emulate the strengths of many different mentors.

I especially love this idea, because I have found that people get so busy, and it can be hard to find time to confer if you and they are in meetings frequently. Nonetheless, almost anyone who is close to you would be willing to give one hour per quarter! Phil, Cory, and Keith all realized that they needed a support system that was a little less formal than hiring a coach to help them stay centered and clear.

Taking it a step further, some of my Leadership With Heart guests mentioned that they did hire a coach to help them sort things out regarding their leadership, communication, organizational management, and much more. As an executive coach myself, I know that being a more formal sounding board to leaders who have the power to impact the experience for so many in the workplace is priceless. I can provide a third-party, educated view on complicated topics.

Mike Pritchard, chief financial officer at Volunteers of America Colorado, highly recommends consulting with a coach. “I just think it’s hard to do it alone. I do think the benefit of a one-on-one coach really will help somebody just get centered on where they are, and this coach hopefully can help you explore what you need to do to be a better leader.”

This is exactly what happened with Rich Todd, principal and CEO of Innovest Portfolio Solutions. Rich went from a place filled with ego and caring mostly about the survival of his firm to a place where culture and employees came first. Rich and his partners decided to hire a CEO coach who advised them to shift the firm’s focus away from him as the founder and more toward a culture of empowerment. They started taking small steps to include people and recognize them. Now, they direct substantial resources toward social responsibility and volunteering as a company in the community, leadership development, and professional development.

Of that long-term coaching relationship, Rich reflected, “Taking the firm in a different direction, it made me a lot better person, and I’m in it, and we’ve grown immensely since then. And it has little to do with me. It has a lot more to do with others that are here. It’s a great life lesson.”

I have not had formal mentors in my life, but I have called on coaches, close friends, and family when I needed to see things in a different light. I am a predominantly self-reliant person who is very much mission driven, but even I have placed the occasional frantic call to a colleague who I know understands me and will think more clearly than I am able at that moment.

This is also part of my “why” for being an executive coach for leaders who need help with interpersonal skills and relationships. I want to be their sounding board, their safe place where they can bring anything with which they are struggling. Leaders who do what Phil, Cori, Mike, and Rich did by committing to create a support system, whether informal or formal, to use as a sounding board for their leadership can begin to leave traces of caring leadership on the hearts of those they lead. Another important element to focus on is exercising self-care.

Exercise Self-Care

We hear a lot about self-care. As a mother of four children, I could not survive, let alone thrive, as a parent without it. Moreover, as a longtime compassionate leader of teams, I remember when my own self-care fell short, and so did my ability to lead those teams well.

What do I mean by self-care? In the simplest sense, it is taking care of ourselves. We cannot effectively show care for others until we give ourselves the same courtesies.

I love how Alex Smith, chief human resources officer and chief change officer for the City of Memphis, framed this issue so clearly: “You’ve got to put the oxygen mask on yourself first before you can put it on other people. I do believe that it is really important. Otherwise, you can end up putting yourself in a position where you can’t help anyone, because you’re ill or you’re not in the best capacity to do so.”

Striving to become a more caring leader is a complex concept. While we want to be more focused on those who look to us for care and guidance, we must also take close care of ourselves. A significant part of this is what Christinne Johnson of FirstBank described as “having grace for ourselves.” She explained, “We, as individuals, especially those who are in leadership, because we are high achievers and high performers striving forward, we have a tendency to want to be perfect all the time, be perceived as being perfect, and will give grace to others.” Christine added that “caring for ourselves also models that behavior” for those who look to us for guidance. Our expression of self-care then gives them permission to do the same for themselves.

Some examples of self-care might be establishing a workout routine every morning to clear our minds, having a regular appointment with a mental health professional to talk through recurring issues that need focus, spending time in prayer and meditation, taking a group yoga class, or even sitting down with a financial adviser to plan our future, to name a few. We all know what fills us up and makes us feel energized to take on the day and show up as our best selves. Personally, I work out in some form every morning, usually before my four kids awaken. It’s my time for calm and quiet.

As Christinne was quoted above, self-care is also giving ourselves the freedom to be imperfect. In other words, we need to exercise self-compassion. Self-compassion, which was put into practice by Kristin Neff, associate professor of human development and culture, Educational Psychology Department, University of Texas at Austin, “involves acting the same way towards yourself [as you do toward others] when you are having a difficult time, fail, or notice something you don’t like about yourself. Instead of just ignoring your pain with a ’stiff upper lip’ mentality, you stop to tell yourself, ’This is really difficult right now; how can I comfort and care for myself in this moment?’”²

When we exercise self-compassion, then, we rest into the truth that our mistakes do not define us as people. We don’t allow our mishaps to reign over our minds. We care for ourselves, which allows us to fully care for those we lead. I know that this can be easier said than done, but with support and a consistent focus on caring for our mind, body, soul, and spirit, we can get there.

Just as an artist has many instruments to create beautiful works of art, so too must leaders care for every aspect of themselves to deliver their own unique leadership. Self-care is really one of the greatest instruments that leaders can access to deliver beautiful experiences for those they lead. It is also one of the greatest gifts we give those around us. An additional critical behavior on which to focus is being authentically you.

Be Authentically You

“I think one of the most important things is to know yourself. People see authenticity, and they know it right away when they see it, and they’ll get behind that.” I absolutely love this simple quote from Jim Reuter, president and CEO of FirstBank! If I want to be a caring leader, I must be authentically me.

What does authenticity look like in the context of the caring leader? It means that we do not show up one way for one person or group and another way for someone else. We are who we are, no matter what, and we do not pretend to be someone that we are not. We do not shy away from telling the truth about ourselves. In fact, we endear ourselves to others because of that truth.

To be authentically me, I must know myself well. Otherwise, my behaviors might shift in the wind. To know myself well means that I am self-aware of what might trigger me, what makes me smile, what makes me react or be proactive.

I choose every day to show up authentically me. I know that I am successful in this because this is how others describe me. Leaders who shy away from being authentic either don’t know themselves well or are afraid of how others might think of them. I spent a lot of my life not feeling good enough or worthy to be fully me.

I do not think I arrived at “me” until my early thirties. This was after I realized that I was trying to be someone else to meet my family’s expectations of me. Once I let that go, I was free to show up as fully me. That allowed me to be fully present and care more deeply for those who looked to me for guidance. Before that, I was just a shell of the real me.

Megan Smiley Wick, executive director of Gamma Phi Beta Sorority and Foundation, highlighted the importance of not only knowing oneself but also being able to manage oneself. She explained, “I know a lot about myself, but being able to recognize those things in the moment and manage them has been a . . . very long journey.” Megan recognized that over her leadership journey, whenever she lost the ability to manage her emotions, she was not the best leader.

One example Megan shared was when she was in a group meeting and felt threatened or questioned by someone there. She described how she would respond in that situation: “I move too quickly, I become impatient, I become less sensitive or become too direct, and then I begin to erode trust.” Megan worked with a coach and took some assessments to help her land on ways to exercise better self-management.

I heard the sentiment that Megan expressed many times in my interviews. The caring leaders I interviewed were all more aware of their behaviors than the average leader I had encountered, and out of sheer desire and openness they were better able to manage their emotions and adapt.

Dirk Frese, vice president of sales, marketing, and service at Julabo USA, pointed to the fact that a leader’s level of authenticity is directly correlated to how freely others want to follow her: “We have to be courageous enough to open up ourselves to our employees, that they can see us . . . that they can see our personality. We have to share our personal stories with them. We are not . . . robots. We are human beings. . . . Then they follow us in a highly motivated way.”

Remember, though, being authentic also means that none of us are perfect, but we are uniquely who we are. Being authentic also means that we don’t always show up as the best version of ourselves. As Dirk pointed out, we are all human. As such, we must work hard to reveal the best of ourselves. This effort is part of the daily actions we must focus on if we are to become the caring leaders our people need us to be.

Kristi Turner, chief marketing officer at Compeat Restaurant Management Software, used powerful descriptors to describe this: “Show up in every moment right with that powerful blend of authenticity, humility, self-confidence. And when you do that, . . . each individual will create a kind of tsunami of power that ignites good . . . in the world and everybody around you, and that’s what makes you a great leader.”

As I listened to Kristi, Dirk, Megan, and Jim using these powerful words, I was inspired to live in my own shoes and show up as my best self and help others do the same. The idea of caring leadership as more art than science came alive in these exchanges.

Another important point here is that authenticity means we will show up differently, look differently, speak differently, see things differently. This also represents our authentic selves. Those we lead are a diverse set of people, as are we. When they see that we are being true to who we are, they will do the same and feel cared for as a result. Another ingredient in showing up as a caring leader is to own your own growth.

Own Your Own Growth

Being a manager is tough. Not only do we have to manage the day-to-day tasks and meet timelines and complete projects, but also we are expected to grow people and keep them happy. Often, I say that leadership is a journey, not a destination. We do not ever “arrive” to being the perfect caring leader, but we do have to work every day to be better, to grow ourselves and learn.

Early on in my leadership journey, I worked as an independent consultant for Mary Kay, the cosmetics company. It was the best investment in my leadership skills, as they taught me so much about building relationships with my team members. Whenever there was a conference or training opportunity, I would show up with enthusiasm, because I was so happy to have the opportunity to learn and grow. I grew a lot in the role and grew my team as a result.

During my interview with Rich Gassen, printing production manager at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, he exhibited a hunger for knowledge and learning new ways to motivate his team. Nonetheless, as he recalled for me, he was not always focused on these things. Rich spoke of a time early on in his management career when he inherited team members who had attendance and work ethic issues. While he was trying to establish more team building, the team was not on board, and he had to take disciplinary action. He admitted that he had not been prepared to handle any of it. So, with the help of his manager at the time, he sought out training resources to prepare him for tough situations. He confessed, “I wasn’t the best leader early on, when I was kind of winging it.”

It takes courage to admit that we are not perfect and then seek out the help we need. What I loved most about this exchange with Rich was his reflection on how he had not shown up as a caring leader early in his management career but refocused his efforts to change by seeking personal training and development. Rich exhibited self-awareness, and then he used it to grow himself so that he could lead more effectively.

Just as Rich made some changes to grow himself because of challenges in the workplace, Trent Selbrede, a general manager at Marriott International, did the same thing after realizing that he was “bored, irritable, and stopped having fun in life.” Trent admitted having an interaction with a team member that ended in that team member leaving the company the very next day. In response, Trent focused on owning his own growth and enrolled in a master’s hospitality program. He invested in funding his education because he was “determined to change” himself.

Within a few months of starting the program, he could see the transformation take hold. It helped him change others’ perceptions of him because he was more self-aware, which helped him become a better leader. He shared, “I think that it really helped me figure out I need to be a better father, I need to be a better leader at work, I need to be a better husband, I need to do better at a lot of things.”

I listened to many leadership growth stories like those above, and I was inspired each time by the individual’s struggle to get better. That is what I am inviting us all to do: just get a little better every day. By doing so, we are better able to express more care for those we lead.